At Ease, Soldier

"Resolved, never to allow the least measure of any fretting uneasiness at my father or mother. Resolved to suffer no effects of it, so much as in the least alteration of speech, or motion of the eye; and to be especially careful of it, with respect to any of our family." (Resolution #46, Jonathan Edwards)

On Martin Luther King Jr. Day, when we remember one great Christian leader and the changes that took place (and are still in process of changing) on account of his courage, I'm reminded of the above resolution by your friend and mine, Jonathan Edwards.

Throughout the past couple of years, I've tried to make a point of reading Edwards' resolutions as the new year approaches, and this January was no different.

While I've read through these resolutions, #46 has struck me as a bit out of place, to be honest. It seems clear enough that Edwards would want to fight against "fretting uneasiness" with his family in particular, but it seems out of place.

I mean, in a list that includes such lofty statements as to "live with all my might while I do live," and to never do anything "but what tends to the glory of God", a resolution to not sweat his parents seems a little bit trivial.

But as I've thought about this more and observed myself and the world in general, this resolution has started to make more and more sense.

I could be wrong, but I think that this resolution is as broad in its application as it is deep in its meaning.

Consider Resolution #46 in light of #25: "Resolved, to examine carefully, and constantly, what that one thing in me is, which causes me in the least to doubt the love of God; and to direct all my forces against it."

Bear with me now, I think I may have just lost myself in a fit of Edwards-quoting that I'm not soon to come out of.

The fight to overcome uneasiness around authority figures, and parents in particular, was, for Edwards, a fight to find his rest in the love of God.

I can see so much of this fear-of-authority, fear-of-man idolatry in myself. Why is it that I care so much about peoples' opinion of me? Why is it that I can become so undone when a co-worker says something negative (true or false) about the quality of my work?

The answer gets right down to the core of my being, and it gets right down to the core of Edwards' resolution.

The anwer is that at that moment, when I'm rattled by someone's perceived low opinion of me, or when I am rendered nervous because my boss enters the room, I am failing to believe the love of God as my source of life and meaning. Something else has taken its place.

When I'm nervous and fidgety around authority figures or become undone by someone's perception of me, I'm dethroning the God who has won me back at the cost of His Son.

When this other god--who cannot satisfy and always holds its victims in slavery--sits on the throne of my heart, I'm dethroning the Son of God who has set me free, free indeed.

When I go to the temple of Man Fear, I'm missing out on the true temple, where I'm encouraged to "draw near with a true heart in full assurance of faith" because of the "new and living way that (Jesus) has opened for us through the curtain, that is, through his flesh."

Let's stand firm with confidence in the love of God. He won't waver and He won't fail us. His opinion of us won't change if a professor gets ticked at us, or if we spill food on a patron or if all of our game stories are boring and similar.

His love--His perfect love--casts out all fear, and it's His love that gives us true, God-centered and Christ-exalting confidence.